Byakuya X Reader
by WarriorsLoverForever
Summary: You are about to be elected as third seat of the 6th Division, and you are confident that you will make a good impression on everyone and make new friends. However, there is something that is being stowed away from you about Captain Kuchiki's past. What will you choose to do as you try to delve deep into the heart of the man that was already broken long ago?
1. Chapter 1

**You are about to be elected as third seat of the 6th Division, and you are confident that you will make a good impression on everyone and make new friends. However, there is something that is being stowed away from you about Captain Kuchiki's past. What will you choose to do as you try to delve deep into the heart of the man that was already broken long ago?**

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

You walk nervously down the corridors of the hallway, feeling sweat collect on your head with every step you take. You slowly push your glasses up and pause for a small second, letting out a deep sigh. Today was your first day in Division 6 of the Soul Society. You had recently graduated from school, and would now be appointed as third-command of the thirteenth squad. The teachers had appreciated your studious practices and hard work in fighting and training, and had optimistically replied that it wouldn't be long before you mastered Bankai. Classmates had nicknamed you _tenshi_ (angel in Japanese), because you were such a goody-goody, yet kind-hearted.

As much as the praise had warmed your heart, the fact that you were finally part of the Gotei 13 was both exhilarating, yet filled you with nervousness. You were only a step away from Lieutenant Abarai and Captain Kuchiki. You didn't really know them that well, either, and hoped to make a good first impression.

Your ice blue eyes wander to the door of Captain Kuchiki's office, where you had been scheduled to meet and take a tour of the barracks. You stop next to the door, while wisps of your long, black hair gently sway from the steady wind of a nearby open window. This was it. Now was the time to meet him.

You knock on the door a little too softly for anyone to hear. Long seconds pass, and no one answers, resembling that no one had heard you knock. You urge yourself onwards, and, with new confidence, stepped up to the door and made the knock crisp and loud.

"I am the new third seat of 6th division. May I have permission to enter?"

You wait for a while longer, and then at the sound of someone saying, "Come in," you carefully turn the cold, brass knob, feeling its cool touch. You turn it, and with a small click, you swing the door ajar. You walk in as much of a straight line as possible, and bow as gracefully as possible to the person at the desk.

There was a man there, with black, straight hair, besides from the white hairpieces at the back of his head. He wore his Captain coat, the white robe with the 6th division symbol on it. He had steely gray eyes and a serious expression, as he put down his calligraphy brush besides his artwork. There was no mistaking that this was Captain Kuchiki.

"So, you are the new recruit." He stares emotionlessly at you, making you feel anxious. Would he even approve of you?

You let out a deep breath when he stands up and says, "We shall start the tour of the building, and then you can get yourself settled."

"Yes, Captain Kuchiki."

You follow him as he exits the door and walks into a different hallway, with red, silk carpets and marble floors. Grand windows with beautiful embroidery had flower vases on the windows sills, making a fresh fragrance fill the halls. You are amazed at the mansion's enormous interior. It already had looked big on the outside, but on the inside, it was even more elegant and maze-like.

Finally, you reach a wood door with golden plating around it. In small, almost illegible print on the top of the door was the number 703.

"This is your dorm room. Remember the number. If you keep going down this hall, you'll go to a small room, where most of the people socialize. Keep going past that and you'll head out of the barracks and go outside. Feel free to do anything you like, but please ask if you are lost. Head back the way you came if you want to come back to my office. The rooms next to yours are dorms for other squad members. You may socialize with them, but remember to do your work. You are third-in-command, so you'll have more work than them."

"Understood," you respond, as respectfully as possible, as you try to tuck in the information for later. It would be embarrassing for the captain if you forgot the first things he told you!

Then, your eyes find a door different than all of the dorm rooms. Instead of a plain, wood door outlined with golden frames, it was a sliding door, leading to somewhere big and grand.

"Captain, where does that door lead to?"

The captain looks at the direction that you point to, and for a second, his emotionless eyes flicker.

"The room is off-limits. Please do not go there."

"Oh..." You look down. Had you said something wrong? There seemed to be something important to the captain behind that door, and you didn't want to venture through his business. You decide not to talk more about the topic, but you can't help but feel a tinge of curiosity as the captain bids farewell to you. He disappears behind a wall with a picture frame of a tree.

You take one last look at the door that the captain had forbid you from entering, and then shook your thoughts off. There was no use in worrying about that. You still needed to get comfortable in your new room. You push open the doors.

As soon as you open it, you are welcomed by the smell of honeysuckle. The windows had velvet curtains, bobbing up and down by the wind, since the window had been opened a crack. The bed was enormous, with a faded white bed cloth with small, printed flowers, and a cover that was purple and gold. The pillows had black outlines on it, shaped like parsley, and were soft to the touch. The candle on the tableside nearby was in a painted cup with pictures of the sea, and some papers were stacked neatly next to it.

"This room is amazing..." You have never seen a room so big, and it was for you! But you couldn't lay down and take a nap yet. You needed to finish your work first. You scan the stack of papers that were on the table, which were forms for registering in the squad. You fill them out slowly, trying to use your neatest handwriting possible. Perhaps the captain commented on my handwriting? It was a fat chance, but you still wanted to make a good impression.

When you are done, you leave the room, puzzled on where to submit the paperwork. Do you just hand it to Captain Kuchiki, or do you just leave it somewhere else? You stand in the halls, unsure of where to go, until you encounter a person with spiky, red hair with a dark headband across his head. Under it were some tattoos. He had narrow, red eyes and was tall.

"Hey there. Are you the third seat?" the person asks you.

"Y-yes. Do you know where to hand in the paperwork?"

"Sure. There's a room next to Kuchiki's office where at least one person manages collecting paperwork and submits it to the other squads. It's room 654, to be specific." The red-headed person scratched the back of his neck casually. "Rikichi, one of our unseated officers, should be there."

You smile in thanks, and then inquire, "What is your status in here?"

"Oh, I'm the lieutenant. Renji Abarai."

"I see..." You scratch your chin. "Not to be offensive or anything, but you and Captain Kuchiki are total opposites."

He grinned. "Yeah, that's true."

You decide that you should stop chatting and start heading to the room. You thank Renji, and then, run off, the papers clutched in your hands. When you get there, you meet Rikichi, the officer that Renji had mentioned.

"Hi! Name's Rikichi. Got any paperwork?"

"Yes, here." You hand him the papers. He looks at the page, and then comments, "Woah, you have good handwriting."

"Actually, I have atrocious handwriting, to be honest. However, I need to make a good impression on the captain, right?"

Rikichi looks down. "Well, that is going to be a hard nut to crack. You can't just approach the captain like that and ask away. People say he's went through a tough past. I don't know much, but you could ask Captain Ukitake about it. He could tell you more about Captain Kuchiki, just in case you're interested.

You know you want to know more about your captain, so you ask, "Where can I find Captain Ukitake?"

Rikichi smoothed his black hair. "He is in the 13th division barracks. Just go outside, take a left around the field, and you'll find their place. It's a tall, black building, and you won't miss it."

Hesitation runs through you. "What if Captain Ukitake doesn't agree to talk to me? I mean, it's kind of bad, right?"

"You just can't talk about it straight to Captain Kuchiki. And trust me, Captain Ukitake is very friendly and open. He'll tell you everything."

You force yourself to run across the hallways and go outside before you can change your mind. You had a cold determination in your heart to find out about Byakuya Kuchiki. Sure, he was serious on the outside, but there was something he was hiding.

As you go across the halls, you pass the door that Byakuya had forbidden you from walking through. You pause for a second, as you think about the secrets that Byakuya could be hiding behind that door. What was so important that it needed to be hidden?

Shaking your head, you continue onward, your shoes clattering against marble flooring, until you come to the end of the hallway. You open a door, and sunlight pours out, making you squint. The halls widen into a room, where some members were chatting and goofing around. At a time, you would have been interested in meeting your new companions, but now was not the time. You want to know more about Byakuya Kuchiki, and that was all.

* * *

"Come, sit down. Help yourself to some tea."

Despite Rikichi already telling you about the captain's friendliness, you were still surprised at how nice Captain Ukitake was in welcoming you to tea at absolutely no notice at all. You knew immediately that this captain would be easy to talk to.

"So, you've become the third seat of the 6th Division. How do you feel about it?" he asks, while pouring a tea kettle into two white mugs.

"It's nice, I guess, but I know it's going to be hard." You play around with a strand of hair that dangles from the side of your ear, as you think about how Captain Kuchiki looked when he said the door was off-limits. You saw that expression on his face, even if it was only for a split second. He almost looked...desperate? But why?

"Looks like you're thinking about something."

You nearly jump out of your seat as Captain Ukitake makes the remark.

"Well...yeah. Captain Kuchiki is kind of emotionless. How do I show him that I'm good without approaching him the wrong way?" You curl your hands around the steaming mug of tea.

"That's just how the captain acts, but he's quite kind if you really get to know him. Always does the right thing." He sipped his tea. "Well, his past must be the reason why. Have you met Rukia Kuchiki yet?"

You shake your head no.

"Well, she's considered the sister of Byakuya, you see. She's very nice if you decide to meet her. She once had a sister, Hisana. Byakuya had married Hisana, but then she passed away of a terrible cough. That must have been harsh on him. So, Rukia is now Byakuya's adoptive sister."

"Oh, that's sad..." you murmur, thinking about how prideful your captain was. It was a terrible thing, but you suddenly felt the urge of understanding your captain. You wanted to be able to approach him about the topic, maybe ask him about it. But he would shoo it away if you brought up Hisana, you were sure of it.

"How do you ask Byakuya about stuff? It's too hard to talk to him. I want to understand him, Captain Ukitake." You pick up the mug by the handle and blow on the steam that rises from the top, before taking a tentative sip to test the temperature.

He smiled. "Unfortunately, it's going to be hard to be friends with him. No one can understand Byakuya. He will never find another love, or even make someone close to a friend."

"I wish I could..." You want to talk to him. You _have_ to. Unlike the others, you would approach Byakuya, or at least you would try.

"Thanks, captain. Maybe I'll stop by next time."

"You're welcome here any time!" he called out as you leave your mug on a plate and leave the room.

First, you would have to find out the secret of the door, and see if it had anything to do with Hisana. You know you could get in serious trouble for violating his rules, but sometimes, there were times when you had to break them. You don't know why, but you need to understand the interior behind that serious-faced man.


	2. Chapter 2

**It's kind of lonely here...reviews? Anyway, I was so excited for the next part, I started this new chapter. I hope you enjoy, readers!**

* * *

 **Chapter 2**

You are back at your dorm room, lying in bed, but your mind is alert, racing with opportunities. How could you break into that room and discover what was behind it? There was no way that you could break in without being noticed. But you needed to know.

Angrily, you fiddle with the edge of the cloth. Why did it have to be so hard? Why did Byakuya had to be so hard to read? You look down in defeat, letting out a shaky breath.

You look up when you hear a knock on your door. You stare at the wood for a while, lost in your thoughts, and absently say, "Come in."

You are surprised to find the captain himself, Captain Kuchiki at the door.

"You are late for dinner."

You jump, and immediately look outside the window. You hadn't realized how late it was, busy in your own pondering about Byakuya. How would you explain this to the captain?

"Is there something wrong?" His serious eyes seemed to bore right through you. All you do is look down, still thinking about the door, kept secretive.

That's it. You wouldn't sneak through that stupid door. You would tell Byakuya straight-out how you felt, and that was all. It was his fault if he didn't understand.

"Captain Kuchiki..." You gulp for a second, and fear fills you. What will happen if you say it? You will surely be punished if you bring Hisana up, especially at a time like this. However, you need to get your message across. You must push away that fear. Sighing, you continue, "What does it take...to understand you? What does it take to be close to you, to be your friend...? I want to understand you, but how? It's not fair..."

A tear surprises you by rolling down your cheek. You dab at it, and suddenly glare at him. "Why do you have to be so emotionless about how you feel? I want to help. I know this is only my first day, but I will stay strong, and be the best third-in-command I can be. But how can I do it if I don't understand my own captain? Tell me!"

Surprise flickers in his eyes. He would never have guessed that you thought that way. He takes a deep breath, his gray eyes suddenly seeming sad.

"So, they told you about Hisana, is that right?"

You wince. You hadn't wanted to bring that up into this heated conversation. It made everything worse. You wanted to respect your captain and look up to him, not bring his personal matters in.

"Y-yes, but I still will look up to you for inspiration, for strength, for respect. But I just want to know why...why can't I befriend you?"

The captain stood still in the doorway, his eyes looking over you carefully. Then, he looks away. "Don't get me wrong, but I am not willing to talk about that. I can see that you want to understand me, to be a friend. However, it is harder than it looks. Everything has been hard. Trust me, I do have feelings. I just don't wish to discuss this no longer."

He walks away in that prideful manner, making you call out, "Wait! Please..." More tears fall, and you run to his side. "I need you to wait. You have to stop ignoring others. You need to listen to me. I want to understand you, can't you see?" You crumple to the ground, sobbing hard. This was such a useless attempt. You must look pathetic to your captain...

So, you are shocked to find a hand on your arm. The touch was soft and reassuring, and the skin burned where Byakuya had touched you.

"You are quite different than the others, you know that? You're quite stubborn, yet true to yourself. I can see it in your eyes. You try to understand those who need it."

Your eyes widen, and you shake a little. His tone was now so soft and welcoming, so unlike his personality, that it made your heart beat faster.

"I-I guess so..." you squeak out, wiping your glasses and sniffing. You force yourself up, taking a deep breath. "I shouldn't have taken this too far. I'm sorry, Captain Kuchiki. I took this too far. I just have a dislike for some things...I will take any punishment you give me." You turn away, wanting to run away from this situation entirely.

His gray eyes studied me once more, narrowing a bit, and then he sighed so softly, that you almost can't hear it. Then, he said, "I'll leave to give you some time to relax, but try to not make it a habit of not coming to dinner. Someone could get suspicious."

You nod, knowing that he was being very nice, despite the way you had talked to your captain.

 _He is a strange person..._

You watch as Byakuya Kuchiki leaves the hall, leaving you on the ground and pondering what had just happened.

* * *

You stay in your bedroom, the tears all now dried and your breathing normal again. You knew there was no hope in understanding Byakuya. He had locked away his emotions for too long, and had faced too much. You know you can never understand him.

You decide to take a walk to calm yourself down, and to make it easier to conceal what had happened. You didn't think Byakuya would appreciate this news coming out of his third-command begging like a stupid puppy. That was a rash move, and you know it was wrong. But you had to do something to let him know the truth.

And look where that went.

You know that before you head outside, you'll have to face your to-be-friends that you hadn't seen at lunch. It looks like you couldn't take a walk after all. It would make no sense to take a walk and ignore them, or they'll suspect something was wrong. You had to socialize with them first.

You push aside the straw sliding door, to find some people laughing at chatting. Byakuya was not in sight, probably at his office. He didn't seem like the person who would socialize with people, and that fact was relieving to you. You wouldn't have to face him for a while.

You stroll in, acting as natural as possible, letting a fake smile spread across your face.

"Hey, guys. Sorry that I didn't come for dinner, but I'll admit that I wasn't feeling hungry. As some of you may know, it's my first day, and I'm glad to have the privilege of being your third-in-command!" You grin and bow to them, even though inside, all you want to do is curl up and cry.

"Glad we'll be working with you," one said.

"She's pretty..." another whispers.

"Shut up, will you? This isn't how you meet someone," a person groans, pushing through the crowd. You find out that it is the lieutenant, Renji Abarai.

"It's nice to meet you again, Lieutenant Abarai," you say respectfully.

"Hey, hey," The red-head holds his hands up. "No need for formalities. You can call me Renji."

You stare at him like he had gone crazy. You knew that he was certainly different than Byakuya, but he didn't even want to be called by his formal name? Even then, you know he would be a great friend, and much more approachable than Captain Kuchiki.

"Thanks, Renji." You smile, and this time, it is genuine. It wouldn't be so bad, even with serious-faced Captain Kuchiki.

* * *

Your eyes jolt open to darkness. It is the middle of the night, but you hear a strange knocking at your door. You immediately sit up, rubbing your eyes drowsily. Who could it be at an hour like this? You peer out of the window, and see the moon, reflecting off of the waters of the lake nearby. You admire the beauty of the sky and stars, and avert your eyes to the door.

You stand up in your socks on the wood floor, quickly straightening your hair with a finger. The world is strangely blurry, until you realize that you don't have your glasses on. You quickly pick them up from the nightstand and place them over your ears, and then make a run for the door and swing it open.

Behind it was Captain Kuchiki.

You nearly jump out of your pants as you stare at him in disbelief. What was he doing here? Was he going to punish you for your actions the previous day? Your brain whirls with possibility as you wait for his response.

His black hair, usually adorned with three hairpieces, was now loose and straight. Well, he obviously didn't sleep with them. He was in a white robe, and the Division 6 symbol was printed at the back. He stares at you with serious eyes, and his mouth opens to speak.

"I hope you don't mind me showing something. You must not tell anyone about what I am about to show you. I thought you deserved to know..." He turned away without even waiting for a response or for you to catch up.

You quickly hurry ahead in your night robe, feeling clumsy as you trip around in its long length. Meanwhile, Byakuya walked evenly and pridefully in his robe, not even tripping once, and walking in a straight line. You follow him to a sliding straw door.

The door that Captain Kuchiki had forbidden you to go through.

Your heart beats faster as he opens the door. You struggle to peer over his shoulder, and found an empty room with square tiles. There was nothing in it.

That was it? He was hiding an empty room?

But then you realize that there is a door at the long end of the room.

You continue following him into the room and to the other door. He opens that, too.

You keep on travelling through a maze of empty rooms and doors, until you have the feeling that this trip will never end. But then, when he opens yet another door, you realize that it is bigger than the others, and embroidered with gold at the seams. This was it. The secret that Byakuya Kuchiki had been hiding. They had finally reached their destination.

You find yourself in a room that was organized like a temple. There were portraits of so many people you didn't even study about in school plastered on the walls. In the middle was a single, small portrait on a small table, with incense sticks burning smoke in front of the portrait. The picture was of a young women with dark hair that was straight and curved at the ends, and bangs covered her face, and were split apart in two. Her violet blue eyes were soft and gentle, and she looked polite, soft, and kind. Only some of her kimono was visible, but it was beautiful, with flowers and other fancy designs. It must have taken painstaking work for them to complete that kimono, and it was a shame that it was unknown of the full image of it.

But who was that girl the portrait of? And why did she look so familiar, yet different?

Suddenly, a deep voice penetrates your thoughts. "That is Hisana Kuchiki, my wife. She looks exactly like Rukia, if you have noticed. She was a beautiful woman before she passed away..." His voice trails off, but his face stays emotionless and cold as ever.

"How do you handle it?" you suddenly blurt out before you can stop it. "How do you look so serious?"

Byakuya side-glances at you, and murmurs, "I have learned to handle it, and not let regrets hang me low. I will stay strong, even though I will always be secretly mourning for her. That is the answer."

You nod, and look down. So this was the root of it all, the place that Byakuya had left his feelings, his joy, his agony.

"I still don't get it..." you whisper. "If something like that happened to me, Byakuya, I would feel a lot of pain for it, and I might've never gotten over it."

Your eyes suddenly flare wide, noticing that you had called the captain by his first name for the very first time. Why had you done that?

You are even more surprised when he doesn't even say a word about it. He just looks at you, almost as if he was looking through you. "To be honest, I haven't gotten over it. I have not even remarried ever since, and I never find any color to the world. I just stand here and let my regrets go here. Then, I walk away, and then I don't feel anything else."

You feel these words spin in your head. "Why did you tell me this out of all people? You're so serious and dignified, and I would have completely understood if you had kept it a secret. I had given up by then in understanding you..." You force yourself to let your blue eyes make contact with his. Then, you let out a deep breath, continuing, "Besides, you didn't seem to want to tell me anything, considering the way you always act so serious..."

Byakuya stares at Hisana's portrait, the incense still burning and the smoke being released through an open window. "You are different than the others. You are the only one who tried to understand me. I find that strange, but I suddenly wanted you to know. It doesn't make sense, but you seemed like the right person."

Feeling light-headed, you eye the ground, with its detailed wood floor carvings. The right person? You were still confused. Even then, you were secretly glad inside that he had shared his secret with you out of all people. Maybe you were one step closer to figuring this man out. It was a small step, but it was still progress!

Then, in a whisper so soft that even Byakuya cannot hear, you whisper, "Don't worry. One day, I'll revive that broken heart of yours. I want to understand you, and I will help you, even if you don't appreciate it." A determined, icy gaze replaces your once confused eyes. "I can do this. Trust me."


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks Meumeu2 for your kind words! I appreciate the feedback. I also thank those who followed and favorited. It means a lot!**

 **Hope you all enjoy the next chapter!**

* * *

 **Chapter 3**

You stand in silence with the captain, until the chirps of the crickets and the lights of the fireflies fade away. retreating to soft sunlight filtering through the windows. The next day had begun, but you felt reluctant in leaving.

Finally, Byakuya opened his eyes, breaking from his meditation, and stares at you expectantly. "You will have to go. The others will wonder about you." You watch calmly as he replaces the incense sticks with a new pair, and begins walking to the door. You rush to catch up, trying not to trip over your night robe like last time. Once again, you are sent through the dizzying maze of rooms, one after the other, the same sliding door being pulled away, until you finally reach the hallway.

Captain Kuchiki immediately begins walking away from you to the direction of his bedroom, obviously not wanting you seen with him going through the door.

"Wait."

You call out the word faintly, but he still hears you and turns around. "What is it? I must get ready for the day, third-seat."

"Well..." You twirl a strand of baby hair that had come loose, dangling at the side of your glasses. "I just wanted to thank you. You didn't have to tell me about the room or discuss your past, but you did it anyway." You smile softly, and then look away. "It must have been hard to tell me after concealing the fact..."

He stares at you for a few long seconds, as if trying to choose the right word. Then, the captain states, "It was the right thing," as his dull, gray eyes lock with yours. Then, he nods at you, as if thanking you, and then left without another word. You watch him go in silence, your thoughts still whirling.

"He is a strange man!" you joke quietly to yourself, a smile curling across your face, as you head back to your dorm to get ready for the day.

* * *

After a peaceful breakfast of omelet, you head out for another walk, seeing if you could meet any other people you hadn't met yet. You decide not to go to the Department of Research and Development, based on the rumors you had heard about Captain Kurotsuchi and his supposedly crazy experiments. After a while of walking among green trees and violet flowers, you decide to head to the other side of town to the Squad 10 barracks.

As soon as you knock on the door, a woman with long, orange hair enters the door, with sparkling gray-blue eyes. "Oh, hello. I haven't seen you around before..."

You smile. "I'm the new third-in-command of Division 6."

She nods. "So, did you come here to learn some new fashion styles? Because I, Lieutenant Rangiku Matsumoto, is the right person for the job!" Her eyes glow with excitement as she literally shoves you inside.

"W-what?"

"Come on. Don't be so shy. I'm gonna style up your hair and everything, and no one will pass by you without taking a look at you! You'll look dazzling." She forcefully pushes you into a chair and starts organizing make-up, eyeliner, nail polish, and other frivolous fashion tools. She straightens your hair and collects half of it into a bun, pushing a fake, pink flower in the middle of the bun, while the other half of your hair was left straight.

"Here's a mirror. How do you think you look?"

You stare at the mirror, and say slowly, "It's okay, I guess, but I didn't come here to style my hair, Rangiku." You stand up, making the lieutenant protest.

"Hey, stay here for a little more! I'll apply eyeliner, and blush, and then I might even put a pink tiara crown, and then you'll look like a little queen! Oh, and don't forget the earrings. I think I might even buy some pretty new pairs of glasses for you, and-"

"MATSUMOTO!"

A short, white haired boy enters, his ice blue eyes filled with so much anger that it made you think he was going to blow at any given moment. You realize that he is wearing a Captain's coat. He must have been the child prodigy that people were talking about.

"Why are you taking off your duties, Matsumoto? You think you can relax all day while I have to do all of the paperwork? Get back here at this instant!"

"Aw...but Captain!"

"This is not how you treat your guests!" The boy gave Rangiku one last hard glare, before she sulked out of the room, muttering under her breath. The only words you could pick out were, "This isn't over!"

After Rangiku had left, the white-haired boy turns to you. "Sorry about that. I'm Captain Hitsugaya. You must be the third-seat of Division 6."

"Yes," you respond, feeling awkward that you had to look down to talk to a captain. He was unbelievably short, yet strong and determined enough to be a captain. The idea was a bit confusing.

You and Captain Hitsugaya talk a little bit about the other captains and the rules that you were expected to follow. He never went off topic once. You know that he must be a very serious person, even for his age, and it wouldn't do good to give him a temper.

After a while, you thank him and leave again, deciding to not meet anyone else for the rest of the day. Even with your casual meeting with Captain Hitsugaya, you still couldn't take your mind off of what had occurred between you and Byakuya that night. He had revealed one of his deepest secrets, yet his heart was still locked away in ice, only his mind doing the work.

You sigh, your finger tracing the rough outline of the bark of a tree. You do this for a little bit, until one of your fingers accidentally gets splintered. You end up sucking that finger for the rest of the trip, still thinking pensively. You can't take your thoughts off of the captain for some reason. You couldn't just ignore the captain like he hadn't told nothing. You groan in frustration to yourself.

 _One day, I'll break that iced heart of his._

You know on your heart that you would keep that promise. You wouldn't stand there and do nothing, letting his heart chip away until there was nothing left. You wanted to give him something, but you didn't even know what you would do. All that you knew for a fact was that you wouldn't break that promise.

* * *

When you got home, you did some of the paperwork Captain Kuchiki had assigned you, but your mind was still off the task. You found yourself glancing at Byakuya when you passed him in the halls, your eyes trying to read his emotion, his passions, his hatred...everything. But everything was sealed away in a locked box with absolutely no key whatsoever.

After a while, in the middle of your work, you dropped your brush, made sure the ink was capped, and slammed your fist down on the table in anger and confusion, not knowing what to do. You couldn't sit around doing paperwork. You had to do something.

At lunch, you absent-mindedly picked on your food, your eyes dull and emotionless. To cover it all up, you would attempt at a few sentences of casual conversation, forcing the smiles that pained your heart. You never knew that Byakuya would impact the way you saw things, but it did.

"May I have the third-seat and lieutenant aside for a moment? I wish to speak to them."

Byakuya Kuchiki entered the room, requesting for you and Renji. Tilting your head, you stare at the captain for a split second, puzzled at what information Byakuya was going to bring. Then, you stand up, swallowing your last bite of rice, and place your chopsticks neatly next to your plate, and hurried alongside the lieutenant, until you pass the door threshold.

"You both will be going to the world of the living with me to patrol Karakura Town, in order to help fight off the recent Hollow attacks. Unfortunately, the number has risen." He stares solemnly at you and Renji, and then clears his throat and continues, "It'll be four of us on the mission. Us three and Rukia Kuchiki. We'll leave by tomorrow."

You perk up, excited at the fact that you would finally be able to meet Byakuya's sister. Hopefully, you would be able to be friends with her. Besides, it made you one step closer in understanding your squad. The captain was already cold, as it was, making it hard for you to truly understand him out of the whole squad, but it only puzzled you more in exactly why he had brought you there that night to talk about Hisana. You sigh, shaking the thought off. There was no use in thinking about it right now. You had to keep your mind to the task. Besides, it wasn't a common thing to visit the world of the living.

"Yes, captain," you and Renji say in unison, as the captain tilts his head to bid goodbye, and leaves without another word. You are about to retreat back to your lunch, your thoughts buzzing at the idea of finally showing your squad what you can do, until Renji politely pokes you on the back.

"Er...by the way, why is your hair styled like that?" he asks.

You jump a little, realizing that Rangiku's hairstyle that she had made was still there. You blush a little, and sheepishly smile at him. "Oh...it's a long story."

* * *

Your eyes open very early in the morning. Rubbing your eyes, you force yourself to sit up in bed, staring at the window. The sun was barely up, with the top of the mango-colored circle peeking out from the horizon and filtering through the trees. You put on your glasses and admire the view of dawn for a minute, and then quickly smoothed your hair. It was earlier than usual, but you knew why.

Today, you were leaving for the world of the living. You felt like jumping up and down as excitement filled your soul, but you knew you couldn't act childish in front of everyone, when they thought you were going to slay Hollows! You open your closet and take your Zanpakuto with its sheath safely secured around it. You ran over its smooth surface, and then latched it in the belt of your Soul Reaper uniform.

Your Zanpakuto looks like a normal sword while sheathed, but its shikai form was a thin, silvery-white color. When unleashed, it splits from one to two sharp-tipped blades. At the command, "Spin, _Dansuburedo!_ ", shurikens emerge from the two tips, spinning around and cutting the desired opponent at a rapid, repeating speed until the Hollow was defeated. This was why your Zanpakuto's name meant "dancing blades". You admired your Zanpakuto a lot, and loved when you fought with it.

You took one last look in the mirror, and then pushed the door opened. You walked in silence, and the only sound was your shoes clattering on the floor, due to the early morning hours. No one else would be up yet, and even the socializing room was empty. You walk outside, to find a hell butterfly heading towards you. The black wings of the silent creature flap up and down slowly, and then settles upon your finger.

The hell butterfly sits there for a second, with both antennas twitching slightly, and then you hear the message say, "You are to report to the Senkaimon immediately to enter the world of the living." Then, the butterfly begins soaring away at a fast pace, leading you the way, as you flash-step after it, inhaling and exhaling. You begin climbing a green hill with sunny skies. When you reach the top, you suddenly feel marble under your shoes as you enter the courtyard of the Senkaimon. You slow down when you hear the clatter of the smooth floor under you, gasping for air as the butterfly finally slows down.

You let out a small gasp as you look up to find the towering gates of the Senkaimon. You have only been out of the Soul Society once before, for your supervised training in defeating Hollows. It was an interesting city, and the humans had unbelievable advancements in technology, but it always baffled you for how they never knew about the secret of the afterlife.

Squinting in the distance, you see three figures waiting for you. The tall figure was most likely the captain, with his piercing gray eyes, white captain coat, and white hairpieces on his black hair. Standing next to him was Renji, which you could decipher by his red, spiky hair. The third figure had short, black hair that curved at the ends, and violet-blue eyes. You stare at her in amazement for a second, not believing at how similar Hisana's photo was to her. It had to be Rukia.

Finally, you reach them, your hell butterfly at your side. Rukia turns to you.

"Hi there. I'm Rukia Kuchiki, lieutenant of Squad 13," she says, smiling. Her smile seemed so similar to Hisana's photograph that you were lost in your thoughts for a second, feeling a little shaken. You stare at the ground as uneasiness settles in your mind.

"Hey, is anything wrong?"

Rukia's voice barges into your thoughts, making you jump a little. You shake your head to clear those thoughts, and force a small smile. "No, I'm fine."

She stares at you, her eyes slightly narrowed. Your heart thuds against your chest as she looks at you. Did she suspect anything? However, she didn't say a word, and just smiled back.

"So, what is your name, anyway?"

You quickly introduce yourself to her as the new third-seat of Division 6, with a small bow.

"That's great! I'll assure you that you'll make many new friends there. At least, I did when I was part of their squad. I hope you do well," Rukia said, while straightening the strand of black hair that lingered in front of her face. Then, she grinned, and added in a low, teasing voice, "Try not to get pushed around, though. Byakuya isn't going to cut you some slack, and Renji is kind of rash, so don't follow his stupid ideas."

You and her laugh at the remark, until both of your voices fade away in the talking and rush of officers, preparing the Senkaimon.

As you watch your captain talking to someone, a question arises in your mind. You turn to Rukia and inquire, "So, you used to be in Division 6 as an unseated officer?" You pause for a second, and then continue, "But you had the experience to be in line in becoming a captain long before. Couldn't you have become a lieutenant a little while sooner, instead of moving to another squad?"

Rukia glanced uneasily at you, and then takes a quick look at Byakuya, who is still occupied with speaking to one of the officers who would open the Senkaimon. After Rukia seemed assured that the captain wasn't listening, she turns back to you.

With a whisper, she states slowly, "Actually...Byakuya didn't want me to be a seated officer in any of the squads. Despite my experience and power, I was part of the squad, but not placed into a higher rank." Her gaze wavered, and she looked away. "Let's just say that Nii-sama didn't understand me back then. He didn't understand the extent of my power, and he didn't even trust me. Whenever he looked at my face, he would see Hisana..." Rukia's voice faltered. "Captain Ukitake told you about the story, right?"

You shake your head slowly. "Yes, I did..." You begin thinking about Byakuya again. Was he really that different back then?

Rukia sights the worried look on your face, and then grins. "No need to worry. Things are different now. Let's get this mission done, shall we?" She adjusts her Zanpakuto swiftly, and then gestures for you to follow her. You and her run towards Byakuya and Renji's direction.

When you reach them, you suddenly hear a strange, eerie sound. You turn back to find the source of the sound, which were four hell butterflies, required in order to go through the Senkaimon. One butterfly would go to each of them.

You feel the butterfly's thin legs tickle your shoulder as it brushes past you, and then hovers over your head. A voice sounds loud and clear through the talking of people, declaring, "Open the Senkaimon!"

The officers nearby the door concentrate their spiritual energy into the doors, and they slowly begin to open. You watch as blue light begins filtering through the doors that towered over your head. You attempt to look past the brightness of the light, but it is impossible to see anything past it. The light is nearly blinding when it is finally opened all the way. You squint in the brightness as it glares over your glasses.

Rukia side-glances at you. "Ready to go?"

"Of course," you reply, as you stare ahead. This was your first real mission. Exhilaration and pride flowed through you, but you knew that this wasn't for fun. They would be vanquishing Hollows, and you had to stay on task.

As the officers made their last adjustments to the Senkaimon, you realize that a small, clip-on bunny is hanging from Rukia's belt. Confusion flows through you, as you wonder why the lieutenant would bring such a thing on a mission.

"Um, Lieutenant Kuchiki, could I ask a quick question?" you pipe up, as you adjust your glasses.

"Call me Rukia, and sure."

"Why do you have a...stuffed bunny attached to your belt?"

Rukia jolts in place, and she turns her face away, but you could tell she was blushing. "Well...I like bunnies. W-what's wrong with that?" She smiles to herself. "Byakuya-sama had gifted it to me." She covers the small bunny with her hands, suddenly self-conscious of bringing a toy bunny to the mission. You just watch her, laughing secretly to yourself. You had to admit that it was humorous to see a lieutenant that loved bunnies.

Then, you realize that Byakuya, out of all people, had gifted that small bunny to her. You grin to yourself, looking away to make sure no one saw it.

 _No matter how much he tries to hide it, Byakuya is a very caring person..._ you think, as you look up at the billowing clouds in the blue sky.

Then, you, Rukia, Renji, and Byakuya all headed through the Senkaimon, the light showering over your sight until you could see nothing but bright white in your vision.


	4. Chapter 4

**A shout-out to HarunaOno! Thanks for reviewing!**

 **I hope you all are enjoying the story. Here's our next installment!**

* * *

 **Chapter 4**

You open your eyes to pure black. You feel rock and grit piercing your back, and your glasses hang from your chin. Pain shoots through you when you abruptly push yourself up, and you wildly look around, gasping for breath.

 _Where am I?_

You were supposed to be in the world of the living, where there were humans busied with their own purposes, the smell of baked bread from the bakery, the honking of cars, and all of that human clutter. But now, it was dead silence. The grass beneath you is gray and dried up, now coated with sharp, jagged rocks. The sky was ink black, and a few scraggly, bare trees grasping upward, the leaves long gone. You wonder where the sunlight had come from in order for those trees to even start growing in the first place.

"I have to get out of here..." you murmur to yourself. Quickly, you jump to your feet, wincing when you accidentally trip over a rock. Where was Rukia? Byakuya? Renji? What had happened to them? Why were you even here?

You fumble for your Zanpakuto, and then grasp the cold hilt, fear pouring through you. You would have to be on your own if you wanted to get out of here, wherever you even were. You run across the landscape, the gray bushes scratching at your ankles. You cringe at the pain, but you keep going, even when your glasses fall off your face, disappearing into the tangled knots of rotten thorns. You don't care to pick it up, and you break into a run, without even knowing what you were running from.

"Tell me this is a nightmare..." you mutter to yourself, stopping to catch your breath. Then, you higher your voice, calling out, "Is anyone here? Hello!" Your voice comes out hoarse, and you arch your back, coughing violently. You couldn't keep going like this forever. You would die if you stayed here, hungry, cold, and hurt.

You take a few moments to gulp in a couple of deep breaths, drinking the air gratefully. Putting a hand on the bark of a tree that looked strangely white and cut at the branches, you adjust your hair, pulling out the small grit that was still stuck in it. Then, you collapse on the ground in exhaustion, eyes lowered to the ground.

Were you going to die like this? Would this really be it? You gaze up at the sky, the blackness of it blending in with the dark, dying grass, the gray thornbushes, and the trampled, crumbly leaves. You wonder how the others are doing. Were they okay, and did they also not reach the world of the living?

 _There must have been something wrong when we entered the Senkaimon. There's no way we couldn't have made it..._ You ponder this thought sadly as you close your eyes, letting the light wind ruffle your hair.

"Someone! Help!"

You jolt upward, immediately on your feet, when you hear the high, shrieking voice piercing the quiet air. The voice had sounded familiar. Was it Rukia?

Abruptly, you charge forward through the thorns. Your legs are coated in blood from being scratched and bruised so many times, but you wouldn't stop. You knew from your heart that it was Rukia, and you needed to help her. Your heart thuds against your chest as you flash-step ahead, until your legs felt like they were going to tear off.

Finally, the prickling thorns dissipate, revealing a clearing of gray grass. You squint in the darkness, trying to make out your surroundings. It was blurry after losing your glasses, but you could make out movement in the grass. Yes, there was Rukia, kneeling in the grass, screaming with all of her strength. She was shaking vigorously, banging her Zanpakuto against rocks. Her eyes were as dull as the night sky, as she stared gloomily at the ground.

Next to her was Byakuya's unconscious body.

Your eyes widen in shock and surprise that you nearly crumpled to the ground, along with the fatigue of your legs. "No!" you cry out, running toward Rukia. She jerks towards you, her eyes brimming with fear. She stares at you gloomily, and then looks back at Byakuya.

"W-what happened?" you declare, making direct eye contact with her. Rukia tries to break your gaze, but you continue staring at her intently, fire burning in your eyes. "Tell me!"

"I don't know!" Rukia suddenly cries out. "I found Nii-sama here, all hurt and crippled! I should've done something sooner before we entered the Senkaimon. I should've known if something was wrong, and it would lead us here instead of the world of the living. Now Byakuya is hurt, Renji is missing, and-"

"Stop."

You cut her off firmly, and put a hand on her shoulder. "We're in this together. No matter what happens, don't blame yourself for it! We'll try to heal Byakuya, even if it costs our lives, but you can't falter now." You don't know where you got the strength to say those words, and you couldn't make any promises. But you couldn't just stand here and do nothing, could you?

You stare at Byakuya, who was breathing shallowly. In sympathy, you look down at the ground. He was so prideful yet unsociable, but now he was weak, and you needed to help Rukia in some way. Her once lively eyes were now as gray as the sky at the sight of her brother hurt.

Then, an idea pops into your mind. You know it wasn't the best option, but you knew it would be worth it. You turn back to Rukia, who continually was staring into the distance gloomily.

"Rukia, listen to me!" you say sharply, but there was more fright in your voice. She turns to you, her eyes having a wild, tarnished look in them, but she nods to show she is listening. You let out a shaky breath, holding back tears, and continue, "Do you know any healing Kido that might at least have the slightest effect? Anything is better than nothing."

Rukia gives you an uneasy look. "I guess I could, but I'm better at fighting Kido, not healing. Also, it's too hard to use my spiritual energy in this atmosphere, even if I did try. Nothing would happen if I did any type of Kido. It's useless."

She was going to give up? Would they all rot away in this gray, crestfallen realm, never to be seen again? You could not let that happen. You would get out of here if it meant your life.

"I'll lend you some of my spiritual energy. With that, you might be able to use Kido," you say simply, pushing away the reluctant thoughts that filled your mind. There had to be a way to get out of here, or at least heal Byakuya, for that matter.

Rukia seemed to perk up a bit at the idea, but she still didn't buy it. "You're battered and bruised. Are you sure you can do it? You don't owe me anything, and it's okay if you don't want to help. Please don't risk yourself. I'm the one who should be doing that, not you."

You edge closer to her. "No, Rukia," you state firmly, your eyes cold. "I will lend you my spiritual energy to heal him, and then we'll find Renji. Everything will work out, I just know it. At least let me do this for you."

Her eyes look over you carefully, and she manages a weak smile. "I'd be grateful for that. I'll never forget this..." She looks up, now with more confidence. "Thank you..." She looks up, a new light in her eyes. "Let's do this."

You firmly clasp hands with her, and you both concentrate hard, until a green ball of energy is hurled from your palms. You close your eyes tight, trying to get more energy out, with sweat trickling down your forehead. You would have to give it all your strength in order for the healing Kido to work.

When you opened your eyes the green force field was almost complete, circling around Byakuya. You thought you saw Byakuya shift to the side slightly, but he handled the pain slightly. Tears threatened to trickle out of your eyes, as you thought about how he must feel, bottling up all those emotions inside. Then, you shook the thought aside, fighting back the tears. You force yourself to look away, and continue channeling spirit energy until it completely enveloped around the captain. Finally, you collapse to the ground, relieved that the work was done.

Rukia looks down at the ground, trying to maintain the spiritual energy of the force field so it wouldn't flicker away in the healing process. "I really hope Renji is okay..." she mutters to herself, staring blankly at the green energy.

You look out into the gloomy forests. Renji could be anywhere in this never-ending realm...but it would be worth a try in attempting to find him. Besides, you could tell that she was dead-worried about his whereabouts.

"Rukia..." you begin saying. "If you want to look for Renji, I can look after Byakuya."

Rukia jumps a little at the remark, and turns to you. "Are you sure?" She stares at you intently, while pulling back a strand of black hair and sighing to herself.

"I'm confident that I could stay here with Captain Kuchiki while you go find Renji. He couldn't have gotten that far. We have to at least try, and besides, we cannot leave him behind." You shrug slowly, while inspecting a single blade of gray grass, with dirt and dust surrounding it. You knew that Rukia had known Renji for a long time, and she would only be hurt more if she stayed here. You had to convince her to go find him.

She stares at you reluctantly, her eyes filled with so much worry, regret, and numerous other emotion that you couldn't pick out. She always seemed on the verge of crying, but she dealt with every situation no matter what the cost. That was her character, after all.

"Okay, then. I'll be heading off, then." She puts her hands on the ground, wincing when she grazed lightly against a thorn bush, and then heaved herself off of the ground. She began walking away, but not before turning back to take one last glance at you. "Be careful. This is your first mission, after all, but you've faced it bravely. Thank you." She shot a small smile at your direction before setting off, flash-stepping at amazing speed until she was only a blur in the distance. After she was out of sight, you look back down at Byakuya, still unconscious.

You strangely feel sympathy for the captain, as you stand beside him. You look up to the sky, starless and sad. But, in the most strangest way, it was beautiful at the same time. A beauty that was concealed by darkness, isolation, and lifelessness. You whisper to the sky, "I'll take good care of the captain, Rukia, I'll promise you that." A new spark of hope seems to settle in you, as you suddenly feel that everything would be okay. They would get out of this mess...together.

You turn your gaze back to Byakuya, and you kneel down to the ground, your face very close to the force field surrounding him. Letting out a breath, you murmur to him, "It seems unfair that life makes you suffer more, even when to this day, he bottles up his emotion, fear, and regret. However, with every step, you looked at everything with never-ending confidence, and a prideful walk."

Hot tears begin trickling down your cheeks as you continue, "You have locked away your heart, but I can't help but want to know more about you. However, there will never be another Hisana to unlock those thoughts and feelings. But I still wanted to know from the very first day I met you." You gasp for breath as the sobs squeeze and choke your neck. You steady your breathing, and felt confidence burning in you as you stare at the surrounding trees, and face the wind as it blasts into your face.

Then, you make one last promise to Byakuya. Smiling to yourself, you vow, "Even then, despite all of the pain you have gone through, I will protect you. With all my heart, I will protect you on behalf of Rukia-sama and her comrades. But you would never understand my feelings if I told you this while you were conscious, would you?" You let the final tears spill down your face, and dribble down your chin. Then, the tears leave your face, and then fall quietly to the ground. They were wet dots on the rough, prickly thornbushes and dry grass.

You rest your head on the grass, dangerously close to the force field, and let out a deep breath. So many events had occurred at one time, and it was only your first mission! But everything was alright. You lay down next to the forcefield, so you could keep an eye on the captain. It was time that you had some rest.

You sigh as you tuck your arms under your head, and glance at Byakuya one last time before gazing straight up at the sky.

 _Byakuya Kuchiki, I want you to understand me. No matter how much you conceal your emotions, I will protect you with all of my heart._

A last tear sneaks its way on your face as you rest on the ground, right next to the man whose heart had been broken for far too long. The heart that was cold and unsociable on the outside, yet yearning and crying for help on the inside.

The heart that you wanted to protect.


End file.
